Today we’d like to introduce you to Melissa Hite.
Hi Melissa, can you start by introducing yourself? We’d love to learn more about how you got to where you are today?
Hi! I’m Melissa Hite, and I’m a life coach specializing in individuation and the healing of one’s sexuality.
For as long as I can remember, I’ve been fascinated with the human body, healing, and sexuality. My experiences, studies, and curiosities have taken me in many directions but have all revolved around these topics. I often see how sex-negativity, trauma, and cultural conditioning are holding people back from living the vibrant and authentic lives they desire. I love helping people navigate through healing in these areas and watching their joy and freedom come forth on the other side.
I have long appreciated embodiment and movement. I was a gymnast growing up. After high school, I studied massage therapy, lymphatic therapy, and other healing arts. I coached gymnastics as a young adult, and I later reconnected with my acrobatic side through pole dancing and aerial arts during my short acrobatic career.
I had great mentorship in my early 20s that introduced me to the work of Kathleen and Gay Hendricks of The Hendricks Institute. I studied their work diligently for four years–learning deeply about emotional literacy, somatic awareness, body-centered learning, personal integrity, communication skills, authentic living, and so much more.
During this time, I was introduced to the world of legal sex work via Brooke Taylor being interviewed by Oprah Winfrey. I was captivated by this woman and reached out to her to try to connect on a personal level. This message got forwarded, and subsequently misunderstood, leading to me being offered a job as a sex worker! After some time, I decided to try it. It felt bold and audacious and I thought I may regret turning down an experience like that when I was in my later years. I had wonderful support, and I felt confident that I’d be able to heal if it wasn’t a positive experience for me.
What I discovered was pivotal in my life. The healing work I was doing up until that point didn’t hold a candle to going to the core of someone’s sexuality and adding love, compassion, and understanding there. I decided that I couldn’t ignore that call. My next task, and the foundation of my greater work, was to figure out how to navigate that world while maintaining personal integrity. I learned so much through that process, especially about boundaries and how they really work within each of us.
In 2014, I began four years of schooling at The Institute for Sexual Education and Enlightenment and earned the title of Holistic Sex Educator.
In 2015, I began teaching a weekly sex-ed class in SLC called The Birds & The Bees. This ran for two and a half years. I took a break from that to do some traveling and massage therapy work abroad with Cirque du Soleil. When I returned to hold groups again in early 2020, my plans were thwarted.
This pushed me to digitize my work, and I am so grateful for that. I’ve developed an online course on boundaries–specifically internal boundaries–called Boundless Living. I am currently developing other courses on the topics of Touch, Receptivity, and Sexual Rights, with more to follow. I’m excited about having more permanency and reach with my work.
I’m sure you wouldn’t say it’s been obstacle-free, but so far would you say the journey has been a fairly smooth road?
Thankfully, it has not been a smooth road!
The hardest part of my work with sexuality has always been the judgments of others. I’m clear that this comes from their own blocks around sexuality, but it’s still hard, at times, to be looked down upon for my work. I know, deep in the core of me, that my work is healing, sacred, beautiful, and exactly what I’m here to be doing. So, the judgment I receive always brings me full-circle to connecting with that inner truth.
Also, the path of my acrobatic career led me to work for Ringling Brothers & Barnum and Bailey Circus as an aerialist and human cannonball. I know this sounds great, and some of it was, but I was mostly left with pretty severe PTSD. My work and practice deepened with the task of healing my nervous system. It took me 6 years to feel like I was out of the thick of it. I continue to study trauma and healing, and that fully informs my work. So yes, a bit of a rocky road at times, indeed!
Thanks for sharing that. So, maybe next you can tell us a bit more about your work?
My main focus right now is supporting people through a healing journey I created in the form of an online course called Boundless Living. In this course, I take a deep dive with my clients into their relationship with themselves and their personal boundaries. We look at how information from the body informs boundary work, helping guide them toward a life that is more centered, solid, and sovereign.
I also do one-on-one coaching, where I help people with their traumas, blocks, or hang-ups around their sexuality or sexuality in general. This is highly catered to the person or people I am working with, and often involves looking deeper at their relationship with themselves.
Some examples of my work include covering basic information such as anatomy & physiology, helping parents understand age-appropriate information and how to deliver it, being a liaison between dads and developing daughters, helping with problematic habituation and dysfunction, supporting sex workers of all kinds to navigate their work while maintaining personal integrity, and helping menstruators and those who love them navigate their cycles with more ease and grace. In short, I help people become more in touch with themselves and rehumanize their sexual experiences.
Is there anything else you’d like to share with our readers?
Sexuality is a huge part of the human experience that is so beautiful and important. Our relationship with it–and with ourselves–is vital for planetary health. I am so grateful that sexuality is slowly, but surely, coming out of the darkness and given the respect it deserves.
I’d like to thank you for taking the time to have this conversation, and to thank you, the reader, for taking the time to read this! If you are interested in working with me, you can find Boundless Living, my website, and all other contact information at the link below.
Contact Info:
- Linktr.ee/highersexeducation
